i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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