is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
