Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Randomize
