I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize