We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
