I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
