Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
