Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
