just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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