I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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