are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
