So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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