i permit you to call me
i just had sex bonerless
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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