NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
