i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
