do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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