But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
