Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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