Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
