Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Randomize
