Dual....:-)
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
they need to just BURY HIM!
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
