you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
