i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize