You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
