It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
