I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
We named our party play list daddy issues
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
