He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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