Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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