Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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