Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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