my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
i will never coherently bang her
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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