Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize
