Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
