Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
