I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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