I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
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