so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
