Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Randomize