Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
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