How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
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