6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
