So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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