think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize