DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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