If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
