No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
