I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
