He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
