she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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