you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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