I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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