just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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